Wishful Thinking
by hinnyandspoby
Summary: Beginning is inspired by Im.'s "Still Into You." Why did him and his stupid messy hair and beautiful blue eyes have to come back to Rosewood? Why did he even have to leave? It didn't make sense to Spencer, and she really wanted it to make sense. Her friends are there for her 24/7 but they don't know what she's going through. They don't even know the half of it.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer; I don't own Pretty Little Liars, so do you even have to ask?

A/N; Im sorry if i randomly break out into HSM songs.

XXXXXXX

"Come on, Spencer, it's not that hard to find something nice to wear!" Aria called from downstairs.

"It is when you've stolen all of my nice things!" Spencer responded.

"Just your boots-"

"And?"

"And some of your jackets!"

"Exactly!"

"Maybe if you didn't buy a blazer for everyday of the week-"

"Aria-"

"Just wear whatever is at the top of your drawer!"

Spencer reached in her drawer and pulled out a man's grey V-neck t-shirt.

"Except for that-" Ariaexclaimed coming into the room.

"That wasn't supposed to be in there-"

"Spencer-"

"I thought if I just boxed up all the stuff that reminded me of him-"

"You thought-"

"I thought I could pretend we weren't anything because he wasn't anybody."

"But you cant."

"I can't because it was real, Aria-"

"What you two had was real."

"If it was real then-" Spencer paused, "Can we just not go to the Toby place right now?"

"Of course, Spence," Aria got up and pulled a black ruffled shirt out of the drawer, "Here."

"Not that one-"

"This one's my favorite!"

"It was his favorite, Aria."

"Right-" She turned back and pulled out a blue floral top that flowed, "Better?"

Spencer nodded and put the top on with her black jeans and the one pair of black boots that Aria hadn't stole,

"Ready."

"Finally, I'm been wanting to see this movie for a long time!"

"It came out this morning?"

"I saw the previews!" Aria snapped.

Spencer smirked, "Are Hanna and Em meeting us there?"

"I hope so."

"Aria?"

"Spence?"

"Do you miss them?"

Aria nodded, "I miss them because it was always just the four of us, and they were always here when we needed them, but they're not anymore, they're in Philadelphia-"

"It wasn't always just the four of us." Spencer reminded her.

"You know what I meant." Aria replied as they walked into the theatre. They spotted the other two and went over to greet them.

"How's life as a lawyer, Spence?" Hanna asked as they waited in line to get tickets.

"Oh you know, very Hastings-ish."

The two continued to talk as Emily pulled Aria off to the side,

"Whats wrong?"

"Aria, Toby called me today-"

"Did you kick his ass?"

"Aria-"

"Don't start, Em, I know he was your friend too, but just the sight of his t-shirt in her drawer made Spence break down today."

"Is that why you were late?"

Aria nodded, "She can't even say his name without a million things coming-"

"Things she doesn't want to remember, I know, but he's not a bad guy."

"He left her on their wedding day, Em."

"There has to be more to the story."

"Why?"

"Because there always has been."

"But only with him!"

"He was her safe place to land, Aria."

"And-"

"And he still is whether she wants him to be or not."

Before Aria could respond Hanna called them over saying they had bought the tickets.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Like always, Spencer couldn't contentrate during the movie. Hanna was on her phone texting the whole time, probably Caleb. And the events of today kept replaying through Spencer's mind. She had to move on, or she at least had to try. Once the movie was over, the girls separated yet again, Aria with Spencer and Emily with Hanna.

"Aria, you don't need to stay."

"I want to!"

"I'm fine."

"The first thing I learned about you is that when you say your fine, your not."

"Aria, I'll call you the minute I need a friend."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Okay, see you later Spence."

"See you."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

After Hanna finally left, Spencer went up to her room and took out the box. It didn't have a name on it because it didn't have to. She knew. Her friends knew. That's all that mattered.

Spencer sat down on the floor and opened it. All the pictures were upside down incase it accidentally got left open. She took each of the frames out and looked at them, remembering each day as clearly as it had happened yesterday. Next came a teddy bear he had gotten her a few years back, and then a she came across what she was looking for. A little box that held a necklace engraved with an 'S'. Spencer used to wear it everyday. She took it out of the box and put it around her neck. It made her feel sad, yet happy at the same time. She grabbed his t-shirt, which was still in a little ball in the corner. She smelt it, wanting it to smell like him, but only for it to smell like her perfume because she had worn it so many times. Spencer used to steal all of his t-shirts, only to replace them with new ones later. She would wear them whenever he wasn't around, because it made her feel safe, although she never told him that.

Then, all at once, the tears came. Why did she think she could do this? Why did he think he could do this? She put everything back in the box and stuck it under her bed, completely forgetting about the necklace still laced around her neck.

Spencer fell into bed and cried herself to sleep.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The next day at work, Spencer didn't really know what to do with herself. Aria had called her cell about 9 times, but Spencer was ignoring her, figuring the only reason she was calling was because of some problem with Ezra.

Her work phone rang,

"Spencer Hastings."

"_Did you not notice the 9 times I called you?" _Aria asked through the phone.

"Aria-"

"_This is important." _

"More important then work?"

"_Yes, are you busy Friday night?" _

"No?"

"_Yay, your coming to my place."_

"I'm not-"

"_Spence, you may be a lawyer but this is one argument you are not going to win." _

"Spencer can you bring the case file over to my desk?" Her colleague, Andrew, called.

Spencer smirked, "So, Friday then?"

"_Friday." _

XXXXXXXXXXX

Spencer walked over to Andrew's desk and handing him the file, she said, "Here."

"Thank you."

Spencer smiled and started to walk away but Andrew stopped her,

"I couldn't help overhear your conversation, what's on Friday?"

"Spending 'quality time' with a friend."

"Does that mean I can't ask you to dinner?"

Spencers smiled faded, "You were going to ask me to dinner?"

"If thats not weird-"

"No-"

"Spence, we can do it another time-"

Spencer couldn't breathe for a second. 'Spence' was only okay when Toby or one of her friends said it.

"Is everything okay?"

"You called me Spence."

"Was that wrong?"

"Its just Spencer."

"I'm sorry-"

"It's not your fault."

"So, are you free right now?"

Was she free? She wanted to be. But she also didn't want to agree to go out with him only to spend the whole night comparing him to Toby.

"Give me 10 minutes?"

Andrew smiled.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

The two walked into the Grille and had a wonderful time. As he walked her home, he stopped outside her front door and kissed her. For a moment, Spencer kissed back, but then she thought of Toby.

_Spencer and Toby had just finished having dinner at the Grille, where Toby was making fun of Spencer for using her chopsticks wrong, _

"_THE Spencer Hastings can't use chopsticks?" _

"_Shut up." _

_He had been a gentleman and walked her home, even though he was already home since he lived in the loft but at her front door, he grabbed her hand and spun her around and kissed her. _

"_Wow, you really know how to walk a girl home." Spencer stated when they broke apart._

"_Only you." He smirked before he turned around walked away._

Spencer couldn't do it anymore. She pushed Andrew away,

"I'm sorry, but I can't-"

"You can't or you won't?" Andrew stated before leaving.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Spencer sat in her red armchair all night. She finally lost it and grabbed her phone to dial her best friend's number.

"Aria?"

"_What the hell Spencer? It's 2 in the morning!"_

It was?

"I kissed someone tonight."

"_Spence, we aren't in high school anymore-" _

She was right.

"I know-"

"_But who says we have to grow up?"_

"This is why your my best friend, Aria."

"_So who were you kissing?"_

"Andrew-"

"_The lawyer Andrew?"_

"Yes."

"_You don't sound excited."_

"Aria, its not that I'm not excited. I am, and its not that Andrew's not cute, because he is. But he's not Toby."

"_Spence, it's been two years." _

"I know how long its been-"

"_You need to move on."_

"I don't know if I can."

"_Your Spencer freaking Hastings, you can do anything." _

"Not this."

"_You still love him, don't you Spence?"_

"I never stopped."

"_I'm coming over." _

"Aria-"

"To late." Aria said walking into the room.

Aria sat down next to Spencer and took her hand,

"You're the strongest person I know Spencer."

"I might seem strong, but I break."

Aria ooked Spencer in the eye but was distracted when she saw something sparkle around Spencer's neck. The necklace.

"Spence-"

Spencer noticed where she was looking and quickly took the necklace off.

"You werent supposed to see that."

"But I did."

"I meant to take it off-"

"Why did you even have it on?"

"It makes me feel like he's still here."

"But he's not, Spencer."

"You don't think I don't know that? Because I see stuff all the time that I want to show him but everytime I reach for him he's not there. It just gets worse everyday, Aria."

"I know-"

"No, you don't know! You have Ezra! You have someone who loves you to no end and wouldn't-"

"Spence, don't go there."

"It's true."

"Listen to me, your my best friend. And I want you to know you're never alone, not even for a second."

"Aria-"

"Spencer, your going to get through this. We're going to get through this. Together. You're going to come to my house on Friday night and we're going to eat popcorn and drink rootbeer and be little kids."

Spencer smiled.

"Being a little kid sounds good to me."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Aria, you have to cancel your plans with Spencer." Emily Fields demanded through the phone.

"_I can't, Em, she needs her friends right now-"_

"I know that, but right now we have bigger problems-"

"_Which are?"_

"Toby's back."

"_What did you just say?"_

"Toby's back." Emily stated again, a little quieter.

"_What the hell?"_

"He-"

"_Did you know he was coming back?" _

"I didn't think he actually would."

"_Why did he come back?"_

"For Spencer."

"_It's been two years-" _

"Aria-"

"_I don't care what he has to say, Em."_

"Neither does Hanna."

"_Just kick him out on the streets." _

"Aria, do you want us to bring him to you instead?"

"_Do I get to kick his ass?"_

"No-"

"_Your going to have to restrain me then."_

"Be over in 10."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Aria went to answer the door and found it wasn't her friends and the traitor, but Spencer.

"Spence-" Aria paused nervously, "What are you doing here?"

"I know I'm early, but I brought pop and mozzarella sticks from the grille."

"You didn't have to do that-"

"I wanted too."

Aria smiled.

"Aria?"

Spencer questioned as there was another knock on the door.

"I'll get it." Aria stated.

Spencer just shrugged and went into the kitchen while Aria stepped out into the hallway,

"Now is not a good time!" she exclaimed.

"Now is the only time we have!" Emily snapped.

"Spencer's inside!"

"What-" Toby started but Aria cut him off,

"Shut up, Mr. Oh-I'm going to leave my love on our wedding day then be gone for two years and come back like its no big deal."

"Aria-"

"Your lucky I haven't slapped you yet!"

"I'd deserve it."

"He just wants to see her, Aaria."

"Not happening." Hanna and Aria stated together.

"Guys-"

"He doesn't need to see her."

"He's been staring at her picture all day."

"Too bad, so sad." Aria said.

"Aria?" came Spencer's voice from inside, "You okay?"

"I'm okay, just some uninvited guests."

"Who-" Spencer started as she opened the door but stopped dead at the sight of Toby,

"Toby?"

"Hey."

Spencer came out into the hall,

"Two years, Toby Cavanaugh, you've been gone two years and all you say is 'hey'?" (Yes, thats part of a line from HP, don't judge)

"I can't believe you have the guts to come back here."

"I had too."

"Why?"

"Because-" Toby paused and looked at Spencer's friends, "Nevermind."

Spencer turned to Hanna, Aria and Emily, "Can you guys let us talk?"

"Spence, you dont have to talk to him-" Aria stated but Emily gave her a look.

"Please."

Her friends nodded and went inside but before Spencer started to talk she opened the door and sure enough the other three, plus Ezra, were leaning against it,

"You guys are so immature."

"Thank you." the four replied, then went back inside, while Spencer lead Toby outside of Aria's place.

"Spence-"

"Don't."

"Listen, the only reason i came back-"

"Did you come back because you wanted to rub it in my face that you left?"

"I wouldnt-"

"Thats what you say every time."

"I meant what I said."

"About what?"

"About us."

"What about trust?"

(WHAT ABOUT US? WHAT ABOUT TRUST? WHAT ABOUT EVERYTHING WE'VE BEEN THROUGH?"

"I wouldn't trust me either-"

"Tobes-"

"Spence, I never wanted to hurt you-"

(YOU KNOW I NEVER WANTED TO HURT YOU? WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?)

"But you did."

"I know that."

"And I don't know if I can forgive you-"

"I would be surprised if you could-"

"Why did you come back?" Spencer blurted.

"I came back because of you."

"Two years later?"

"You make it sound like an epilogue."

"Maybe it is."

"I had to see you."

"What are you talking about-"

"I'm talking about how I spent everyday trying to work up the nerve to come back here-"

"If you didn't leave in the first place-"

"I wanted to come back right after I left."

"Why didn't you?"

"Because seeing you hurting hurts me."

"You didn't seem to hurt working with Mona."

"Spencer."

"I'm sorry-"

"Don't say your sorry, Spence. I wouldn't be surprised if you hate me, I'd hate me too."

"Thats the thing, I don't hate you. I want to hate you."

"How can you not hate me-"

"Because you were the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Spence-"

"You promised me-"

"Sometimes people don't understand the promises their making when they make them." (TFIOS)

"Obviously," Spencer paused, "Toby?"

"Yeah?"

"What would you say if I asked you to kiss me?"

"I would say your absolutely crazy."

"Then I guess Im absolutely crazy." She said before she leaned up and planted her lips on his for the first time in forever.

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	2. AN

A/N;

For all you out there saying this is plagiarism; Plagiarism is the practice of taking someone else's work or ideas and passing them off as one's own. If you can read, you can clearly see that I do not take any actual lines form 'Still Into You', I read her story and was inspired. The only similar things are the girls going to the movie, and Andrew asking Spencer out. Otherwise, I have Aria living with Spencer, and Toby coming back right away instead of later. That is not plagiarism. In my summary, I say that the beginning of my story is inspired by 'Still Into You', because it was. But only the beginning, my plot line is going in a very different direction, and I've learned to not listen to what people say because they don't know the truth. Your reviews don't get to me at all, because I don't care. Its easier not to. I know I didn't plagiarize, and thats all that matters. So if you'd gladly stop accusing me of things,, it'd be greatly appreaciated.


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